i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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