He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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