I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize