I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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