Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
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