Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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