Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
