By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
