In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
