Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Randomize
