Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
