He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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