I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
