I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
