she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
