it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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