No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
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