We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
