so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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