dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
