Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
