Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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