on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
