discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
