I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
