as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
