Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
