what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
