...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Randomize
