i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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