This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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