Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
