Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
