Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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