my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
