I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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