Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
