This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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