why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Someone signed my nipple.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
