Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
