I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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