Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
