erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
