We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
North Korea, Best Korea!
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Randomize
