I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
