coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She's the barista slut.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
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