I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
