stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
