You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
meet me or not, i'm out of control
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Bring me that man meat
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
