ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
